Ramblings and thoughts...

I haven't written for a while, I guess it's this whole feeling like I've been hit by a train thing. I had forgotten how difficult pregnancy is. It is a difficult, tremendous thing to bring a life into this world. And I am only at the beginning.

I'm wishing my throat didn't still hurt. Who would have thought coughing so much would require this long of a recovery? I'm hoping there won't be permanent damage... if so, I hope it makes my voice sound cooler :)
I've been listening to some of my old recordings of songs and past CDs and even just stuff that I never really released, little pieces of songs and bits that I had made up on the fly and never really listened to again. Sometimes my voice gets on my nerves because I can hear all my pitch issues. I should have practiced more. I need to call the studio that I was working with. Pregnancy and being a mom has really put some big hiccups in what I was doing there. Now, it's been so long that I feel guilty about calling them. I need to just stop being stupid and call them. Maybe I'll call Monday, actually, I could probably call tomorrow, I'm sure they're probably working. I love those guys. I so enjoyed working with them. I have really hoped that their studio would take off. The music industry in LR is terrible. It really is.
I have been thinking about how it would be cool to do a show at a coffee house or someplace intimate like that. I love to just get up and share all the deep places in me, tell my stories, and just sing.
I am listening to a friend who did harmonies with me on a song and it makes me wish I could do that again. Does anyone want to just come over and sing with me? I so need to do that. I want to just sit in my living room with my musician friends and share songs that we have written. I just love to hear the innermost parts of souls. I love to hear the thoughts put to music and the beauty of it. I tried to do that once in college, I called it Artists Anonymous. It was one good night and a few friends came and a few friends played. I definitely need to do that again.

I'm tired of all the time I waste in front of my computer. I'm tired of the television. Lord, please give me new vision, new fire, new wine. I feel tired and thirsty. I feel weak. Please help me.