Yesterday afternoon I posted a picture of my kids sitting in front of our computer, watching a video Levi got from the library. We try to watch one TV show or video per week here at the Hefner house.
I say this not to brag about how awesome we are or anything like that. I post this so that others can know that it's possible.
I originally wrote about not watching TV a few years ago here
Note: I'm going to use the words video, TV show and movie interchangeably. They are all pretty much the same to us.
So, a few years ago we started having babies and found out that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that a child have no screen time until they are two years old. So with Levi we decided to actively keep him from watching television and movies, looking at our phones and things like that.
Ben and I have since made a very conscious decision to keep our kids from watching very much television. It's hard because Levi loves TV probably as much as I do. He begs for TV and movies, longs for them, loves them. Maybe it's because he's starving for them.
My answer is always "one movie per week." You would think that he would quickly use up his credits first thing on Monday, but with a little direction I help him to wait and forget about it. I'm amazed that sometimes we even get to a Sunday afternoon at my parents house and realize he hasn't watched a single video.
Life is more painful without TV. It's much easier to just "plug my kids in" so that I can actually get the house cleaned or just have a moment to myself. But, every mom knows that her child is affected by television. You know because as soon as your precious little one's show is over they howl for more. It's all fine and roses until that show is over, then all of hades breaks loose. I hate that time, that time when that beautiful space is over and the child just wants more. That makes me not want to have movie time at all. But that's when I just put my head down and give the firmest "No" I can give. It has to be the most steadfast, no ifs ands or buts kind of no, otherwise the child will sense your lack of position and pounce on his chance to get his foot in the door for another movie.
Here's the best part about my kids only watching one movie a week. They play by themselves. They get creative. They have long attention spans. They carry on conversations with adults. That last one has only been happening recently with Levi, but I am totally pumped about it. This morning they played in our bathroom with a little glow in the dark toy for about 20 minutes. It was amazing. I actually got the dishwasher unloaded. Levi was pulling cars on his new wooden train last night. They played in Aria's room with her stuffed animals for at least 30 minutes. Yes, it was here and there and yes I had to stop a few fights and tell them, no, we are not watching the planes DVD again. But that's just part of it. It's part of the sacrifice.
I say all of this to encourage other moms to try it. It's hard and it stinks and your child WILL ask to watch a movie dozens of times a day, but EVENTUALLY they will find something else to do. They might get into things (Aria is the queen of this, how many stains do we have on our carpets from me not being a responsible parent? Too many). But eventually they learn to pick up a book and look at it. I know I sound like a psycho for those of you whose kids watch a healthy amount of TV, but I can almost guarantee you that a child will find something else to do besides sit and watch. You just have to be firm and ready for a fight. Oh yes, and I do discipline Levi for whining and falling on the floor when he doesn't get to watch a show. Bad attitudes get spankings, at least at our house.
Okay, so that's my post. It's definitely one of the parenting choices we have made that we have not regretted.
Showing posts with label television. Show all posts
Showing posts with label television. Show all posts
Thursday, December 5, 2013
Monday, April 18, 2011
The Redemption of My Physical Body: part twenty
Wow, it's been a while since I have talked about this subject. I think it might be my favorite one because I am continuing to live in this blessing every day. I'm continue to live in freedom like I never thought I could know.
All in all I'm about 60 pounds lighter than my all-time highest weight. (I'm just saying this so that people can know that it really was a lot, not just 10 or 15 pounds, it took a while). I probably weighed something like that in college or so. I'm 40 pounds lighter than when I got married. So in a total of three years I lost 10, gained 30 and then lost 60 pounds. Needless to say, my body has kind of been on this kind of roller coaster.
Today I went for a run. I haven't really ran in ages. I mean, I run when I play ultimate and stuff like that, but not gone out and pounded the pavement. My exercise of choice is walking. It's easier to do, you don't always sweat really bad so you don't have to shower afterward, you can go a short distance or a long distance, I can walk with my jeans on, all I need are my tennis shoes. I even walk in my Chacos sometimes. Levi loves to walk with me, I can think and breathe and my arms and legs are moving, it's beautiful. I can enjoy nature and I'm rarely in pain (except maybe when I go up a hill or something). Okay, but I was sitting my quiet time, just enjoying the presence of the Lord when suddenly He impressed on my heart to go for a run. Really God? I have struggled with shin splints throughout my life, I have had knee issues, are you sure? Yes, go for a run.
So I got out there and it was really amazing. I felt so light and free. I had to stop and walk several times because my lungs weren't used to it, but that's okay. I'm really past caring what anybody thinks of me :). But my heart was pumping and I was pushing it. I was praying and asking that God would help our church to persevere, to break through the wall and continue in our prayer movement. I was praying for my friend who shared a really difficult thing lately, she's a runner so I thought of her :) and just praying that the Enemy couldn't lie to her.
(Side note: whenever I experience a spiritual mountaintop with God or have an amazing breakthrough or share something that is so deep inside of me I always encounter lies from the Enemy. It's just how it works. You think, "man, I said this wrong, now people are going to think this about me..." The truth is that Satan just got the crap knocked out of him and he's just fighting back, but the only thing he knows how to do is lie. So, the truth is that God delights in her bringing things into the light that were kept in darkness, she has great courage and has impacted my life for the better because of it.)
I was able to just struggle and fight and let it all come out in my prayers to the Lord. I probably only went a mile or so and probably walked half of it. But I am convinced that it was better than sitting on my couch. :)
The cool thing about my run is that I experienced freedom in a place where there had been bondage before. Exercise has been an area of bondage for me. Let me explain: I always felt like I "needed" to exercise in order to lose weight. Exercise was a chore, a punishment for my "bad behavior" on a diet. It was my thrashing about to get myself out of this quicksand that was my struggle with weight/food/binge-eating. God called me for a while just to lay down exercising all together. It was getting out of hand and He just told me to stop and only eat what my body called for. Whoa. Are you sure about this God? (Do you see how much I question him?!? haha!) But He was faithful to allow me to lose weight just by moving throughout my day as a coffee shop worker and eating (a lot) less than I did by just eating what my body CALLED for.
Then when I got pregnant He gave me walking. I walked about 3-4 times a week anywhere from 1-3 miles depending on what I felt like doing. God was telling me to listen to my body and take exercise off the pedestal. He was slowly prying the food out of my hands and slowly giving things back to me a hundred times better than what they had been before. I don't know if this means I will start running now, I don't know. I will let you know if that's the case, but I do know that I can have freedom to go and I can pray and ask Him for direction.
Also as a side note, I have been encouraging my husband to run. He complains sometimes that he doesn't get enough exercise and sometimes doesn't have enough stamina. I told him he should start running after work. His response was yeah, but I don't like running. (who DOES? Just kidding, I know there are some weird people out there who do:)) But it was like God was saying, hey, maybe you should stop telling him what to do and just be a freakin' example. He asked me how it went when I got back and I said it was great and told him all God taught me and showed me and he was like, man, I really wanna get a running stroller so I can take Levi. WHAT?! That's all I had to do? Just make it look like fun? Haha! Crazy.
I feel like the more I get healthy, the healthier I want to be. Does that make sense? It's like I know that eating healthy foods will make me feel better, so that's what I do. I know that getting some exercise makes me feel better, so that's what I do. It's little by little baby steps to get where you want to go. It's not just one big crash diet over and over every weekend, it is slowly and steadily and the more you do it, the more you will want to do it. Don't let Satan lie to you and tell you that you will never make it. I believed that lie for years. I thought, this weight is NEVER going to come off. I wanted to believe it was possible, but there was still this nagging voice (Satan's) that was telling me I couldn't. It was as though I had to stop "trying" and start listening to God.
For all of you practicals out there who are saying, yeah right Jody, that's fine and good for you, but I'm just impossible. I want to challenge you to take these practical steps.
-Turn off your TV. Don't watch it, don't look at it. Don't watch TV online.
-Don't eat while on the computer. Don't do it. I know, it's killing two birds with one stone. But it distracts you from what you are actually eating and you end up ignoring your stomach signs.
-Go to bed at 10, wake up at 6 and spend an hour with God before you do anything else. Before you check your email, phone, Facebook, blog, all of that. Just open up the Bible, get a journal and ask Him to speak. Read a Psalm, or a Proverb, read from the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke or John. Those are good places to start. Get your journal and talk to God. If you schedule is earlier or later than mine, that's totally fine, but make sure and give yourself a solid hour. Not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes, an hour. This allows ample time to wait for the Lord to speak.
-Move throughout the day. If it's housework, just do it. If it's going on a walk at lunch instead of sleeping at your desk, do it. If it is getting home from work and getting your tennis shoes on and going for a 15 minute walk around the block, just do it. If it's going on a bike ride after dinner, do it. :)
-Eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full. Eat mostly healthy, but don't be completely perfect. It's okay to eat something with sugar in it as long as it's not the whole carton of ice cream. Sometimes it's just a bite of cake or one cookie. If you know you can't stop at one, then just don't have some. There will be another something tasty to eat tomorrow and for sure you WON'T regret not eating the sugary thing. I try not to have something sweet after every meal. It needs to be a treat every now and then. If you find you are eating dessert every night just say, I'm going to skip a few nights or days and not eat any. There are times when I tell my husband, "no, we can't have ice cream in the house, I'm going to clean it out." So we don't have ice cream in the house for a couple of weeks, and then it passes.
Okay, those are my practicals. If you have any other questions feel free to comment or email me or something.
All in all I'm about 60 pounds lighter than my all-time highest weight. (I'm just saying this so that people can know that it really was a lot, not just 10 or 15 pounds, it took a while). I probably weighed something like that in college or so. I'm 40 pounds lighter than when I got married. So in a total of three years I lost 10, gained 30 and then lost 60 pounds. Needless to say, my body has kind of been on this kind of roller coaster.
Today I went for a run. I haven't really ran in ages. I mean, I run when I play ultimate and stuff like that, but not gone out and pounded the pavement. My exercise of choice is walking. It's easier to do, you don't always sweat really bad so you don't have to shower afterward, you can go a short distance or a long distance, I can walk with my jeans on, all I need are my tennis shoes. I even walk in my Chacos sometimes. Levi loves to walk with me, I can think and breathe and my arms and legs are moving, it's beautiful. I can enjoy nature and I'm rarely in pain (except maybe when I go up a hill or something). Okay, but I was sitting my quiet time, just enjoying the presence of the Lord when suddenly He impressed on my heart to go for a run. Really God? I have struggled with shin splints throughout my life, I have had knee issues, are you sure? Yes, go for a run.
So I got out there and it was really amazing. I felt so light and free. I had to stop and walk several times because my lungs weren't used to it, but that's okay. I'm really past caring what anybody thinks of me :). But my heart was pumping and I was pushing it. I was praying and asking that God would help our church to persevere, to break through the wall and continue in our prayer movement. I was praying for my friend who shared a really difficult thing lately, she's a runner so I thought of her :) and just praying that the Enemy couldn't lie to her.
(Side note: whenever I experience a spiritual mountaintop with God or have an amazing breakthrough or share something that is so deep inside of me I always encounter lies from the Enemy. It's just how it works. You think, "man, I said this wrong, now people are going to think this about me..." The truth is that Satan just got the crap knocked out of him and he's just fighting back, but the only thing he knows how to do is lie. So, the truth is that God delights in her bringing things into the light that were kept in darkness, she has great courage and has impacted my life for the better because of it.)
I was able to just struggle and fight and let it all come out in my prayers to the Lord. I probably only went a mile or so and probably walked half of it. But I am convinced that it was better than sitting on my couch. :)
The cool thing about my run is that I experienced freedom in a place where there had been bondage before. Exercise has been an area of bondage for me. Let me explain: I always felt like I "needed" to exercise in order to lose weight. Exercise was a chore, a punishment for my "bad behavior" on a diet. It was my thrashing about to get myself out of this quicksand that was my struggle with weight/food/binge-eating. God called me for a while just to lay down exercising all together. It was getting out of hand and He just told me to stop and only eat what my body called for. Whoa. Are you sure about this God? (Do you see how much I question him?!? haha!) But He was faithful to allow me to lose weight just by moving throughout my day as a coffee shop worker and eating (a lot) less than I did by just eating what my body CALLED for.
Then when I got pregnant He gave me walking. I walked about 3-4 times a week anywhere from 1-3 miles depending on what I felt like doing. God was telling me to listen to my body and take exercise off the pedestal. He was slowly prying the food out of my hands and slowly giving things back to me a hundred times better than what they had been before. I don't know if this means I will start running now, I don't know. I will let you know if that's the case, but I do know that I can have freedom to go and I can pray and ask Him for direction.
Also as a side note, I have been encouraging my husband to run. He complains sometimes that he doesn't get enough exercise and sometimes doesn't have enough stamina. I told him he should start running after work. His response was yeah, but I don't like running. (who DOES? Just kidding, I know there are some weird people out there who do:)) But it was like God was saying, hey, maybe you should stop telling him what to do and just be a freakin' example. He asked me how it went when I got back and I said it was great and told him all God taught me and showed me and he was like, man, I really wanna get a running stroller so I can take Levi. WHAT?! That's all I had to do? Just make it look like fun? Haha! Crazy.
I feel like the more I get healthy, the healthier I want to be. Does that make sense? It's like I know that eating healthy foods will make me feel better, so that's what I do. I know that getting some exercise makes me feel better, so that's what I do. It's little by little baby steps to get where you want to go. It's not just one big crash diet over and over every weekend, it is slowly and steadily and the more you do it, the more you will want to do it. Don't let Satan lie to you and tell you that you will never make it. I believed that lie for years. I thought, this weight is NEVER going to come off. I wanted to believe it was possible, but there was still this nagging voice (Satan's) that was telling me I couldn't. It was as though I had to stop "trying" and start listening to God.
For all of you practicals out there who are saying, yeah right Jody, that's fine and good for you, but I'm just impossible. I want to challenge you to take these practical steps.
-Turn off your TV. Don't watch it, don't look at it. Don't watch TV online.
-Don't eat while on the computer. Don't do it. I know, it's killing two birds with one stone. But it distracts you from what you are actually eating and you end up ignoring your stomach signs.
-Go to bed at 10, wake up at 6 and spend an hour with God before you do anything else. Before you check your email, phone, Facebook, blog, all of that. Just open up the Bible, get a journal and ask Him to speak. Read a Psalm, or a Proverb, read from the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke or John. Those are good places to start. Get your journal and talk to God. If you schedule is earlier or later than mine, that's totally fine, but make sure and give yourself a solid hour. Not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes, an hour. This allows ample time to wait for the Lord to speak.
-Move throughout the day. If it's housework, just do it. If it's going on a walk at lunch instead of sleeping at your desk, do it. If it is getting home from work and getting your tennis shoes on and going for a 15 minute walk around the block, just do it. If it's going on a bike ride after dinner, do it. :)
-Eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full. Eat mostly healthy, but don't be completely perfect. It's okay to eat something with sugar in it as long as it's not the whole carton of ice cream. Sometimes it's just a bite of cake or one cookie. If you know you can't stop at one, then just don't have some. There will be another something tasty to eat tomorrow and for sure you WON'T regret not eating the sugary thing. I try not to have something sweet after every meal. It needs to be a treat every now and then. If you find you are eating dessert every night just say, I'm going to skip a few nights or days and not eat any. There are times when I tell my husband, "no, we can't have ice cream in the house, I'm going to clean it out." So we don't have ice cream in the house for a couple of weeks, and then it passes.
Okay, those are my practicals. If you have any other questions feel free to comment or email me or something.
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Reasons why I don't watch Glee and certain other programs...
I don't want to be legalistic. We are saved by grace, not what we do.
"Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become and stumbling block to the weak. For it anyone with a weak conscience sees you who have this knowledge eating in an idol's temple, won't he be emboldened to eat what has been sacrificed to idols?So this weak brother, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against your brothers in this way you wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall."
1 Corinthians 8:9-13
I am the weaker brother. And I'm okay with that.
I feel like we live in a pornographic culture. We live in an immoral culture on other fronts as well, but I'm not talking about those right now. I'm just going to call it like I see it and we are surrounded by it. We don't even really notice it. Our movies and advertising are full of it, it's all over the place, in our television shows, in our music...
So as I was driving the other day they were talking about Glee. I would LOVE to watch Glee. I love high school choir stuff, singing, they are amazing musicians, all that stuff. I have seen one episode of Glee. Sadly, I will never watch it again. The sexual content of Glee is not a healthy place for my mind to be. I am the weaker brother and I have to flee from stuff like this.
I hate having to tiptoe around our culture, but I hate even more watching something and slowly trying to dismiss little innuendos, avert my eyes from certain things, rip my mind away (the biggest battlefield). On this same tangent I am going to now go off, so please excuse me.
Every week I see girls who are facing an unplanned pregnancy who are sexually active. When I suggest that they remain abstinent outside of marriage they look at me like I have two heads. What they often don't realize is that sex is not a requirement to get to know someone. Actually, it's a hindrance. If two people "work in bed" that does not mean, well, anything really. We are all sexual beings and we can all get pleasure from sex. What we are missing is the deeper emotional, spiritual, relational element that is VITAL to a good relationship. Good sex follows health in those areas. Television programs and movies follow the opposite of this. These days almost none of the love stories move me anymore. If a couple sleeps together before marriage and actual commitment in a movie they have LOST me altogether. I'm totally serious. Some of you are looking at me like I'm a prude right now or that I'm legalistic or even unrealistic and I say, the culture is the one being unrealistic and we have accepted it lock stock and barrel.
Can you feel my anger burning off the page? This is a passion of mine. Not only because of my own sin that I have fallen into and struggled through as though walking through hell, but also because of the messed up lives I have seen.
I heard once that in the show Friends, Jennifer Anniston's character, Rachel, sleeps with (I think) a total of 38 guys. I wonder which sexually transmitted diseases she experienced or passed on? Out of all these guys she just happened to have one unplanned pregnancy with her long-time love interest, how convenient? I see girls who are with the same guy for years and go out and sleep with another guy and happen to get pregnant with him. I'm not saying ANY of this was right, but it is drastically different than what Hollywood has spoon-fed us. Do I sound angry? Good, because I am.
I do not like to take this stand. I love TV, I could watch TV all day long (and have) if I could. My sister and I memorized the first four seasons of the Office. I loved it. I loved watching The Hills and The City but then realized what a self-centered attitude they influenced me with, just different little things that made me realize that there are better things to be done with my time that would have a greater impact on eternity.
I'm not trying to tell anyone what they should or shouldn't watch, I just want you to think about what you are putting into your mind. If you keep struggling with this one sin, this one thing, I would strongly encourage you to begin looking critically at what you take in.
"Be careful, however, that the exercise of your freedom does not become and stumbling block to the weak. For it anyone with a weak conscience sees you who have this knowledge eating in an idol's temple, won't he be emboldened to eat what has been sacrificed to idols?So this weak brother, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against your brothers in this way you wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ. Therefore, if what I eat causes my brother to fall into sin, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause him to fall."
1 Corinthians 8:9-13
I am the weaker brother. And I'm okay with that.
I feel like we live in a pornographic culture. We live in an immoral culture on other fronts as well, but I'm not talking about those right now. I'm just going to call it like I see it and we are surrounded by it. We don't even really notice it. Our movies and advertising are full of it, it's all over the place, in our television shows, in our music...
So as I was driving the other day they were talking about Glee. I would LOVE to watch Glee. I love high school choir stuff, singing, they are amazing musicians, all that stuff. I have seen one episode of Glee. Sadly, I will never watch it again. The sexual content of Glee is not a healthy place for my mind to be. I am the weaker brother and I have to flee from stuff like this.
I hate having to tiptoe around our culture, but I hate even more watching something and slowly trying to dismiss little innuendos, avert my eyes from certain things, rip my mind away (the biggest battlefield). On this same tangent I am going to now go off, so please excuse me.
Every week I see girls who are facing an unplanned pregnancy who are sexually active. When I suggest that they remain abstinent outside of marriage they look at me like I have two heads. What they often don't realize is that sex is not a requirement to get to know someone. Actually, it's a hindrance. If two people "work in bed" that does not mean, well, anything really. We are all sexual beings and we can all get pleasure from sex. What we are missing is the deeper emotional, spiritual, relational element that is VITAL to a good relationship. Good sex follows health in those areas. Television programs and movies follow the opposite of this. These days almost none of the love stories move me anymore. If a couple sleeps together before marriage and actual commitment in a movie they have LOST me altogether. I'm totally serious. Some of you are looking at me like I'm a prude right now or that I'm legalistic or even unrealistic and I say, the culture is the one being unrealistic and we have accepted it lock stock and barrel.
Can you feel my anger burning off the page? This is a passion of mine. Not only because of my own sin that I have fallen into and struggled through as though walking through hell, but also because of the messed up lives I have seen.
I heard once that in the show Friends, Jennifer Anniston's character, Rachel, sleeps with (I think) a total of 38 guys. I wonder which sexually transmitted diseases she experienced or passed on? Out of all these guys she just happened to have one unplanned pregnancy with her long-time love interest, how convenient? I see girls who are with the same guy for years and go out and sleep with another guy and happen to get pregnant with him. I'm not saying ANY of this was right, but it is drastically different than what Hollywood has spoon-fed us. Do I sound angry? Good, because I am.
I do not like to take this stand. I love TV, I could watch TV all day long (and have) if I could. My sister and I memorized the first four seasons of the Office. I loved it. I loved watching The Hills and The City but then realized what a self-centered attitude they influenced me with, just different little things that made me realize that there are better things to be done with my time that would have a greater impact on eternity.
I'm not trying to tell anyone what they should or shouldn't watch, I just want you to think about what you are putting into your mind. If you keep struggling with this one sin, this one thing, I would strongly encourage you to begin looking critically at what you take in.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
The Redemption of My Physical Body: part nineteen
I have realized more and more in my life that when I try to control something I end up messing it up. As soon as I get my greasy little fingers on something it is bound to just fall apart.
I feel like weight loss needs to be almost unnoticeable. What is the saying? A watched pot never boils? When I keep stepping on the scale every day and several times a day, when I keep going and looking in the mirror at my stomach and keep thinking about it I defeat myself. When I exercise too hard and starve myself I either collapse or I give up and eat everything in sight.
All my life whenever I would TRY to lose weight I would either maintain or gain. That sounds crazy right? I think it was because my trying was fueled by my own self-will. As soon as my self-will burnt out I would crash and binge. I am still amazed at how long I did this. I mean, it was years of dieting one week and crashing that weekend, crashing several times in a week even. Maybe keeping it up for a two or three weeks (I'm not sure how long sometimes it runs together in my mind) and then crashing. Maybe because the amount of weight felt insurmountable. I remember when I reached 50 pounds over what I needed to be... it felt like I would never go back. I remember being categorized on the doctor's charts as being "obese" ... I really remember that, that hopelessness.
Hopelessness is a dark place. I think many women feel this way about their weight. Maybe you have 100 pounds to lose, maybe it's just the last 20 pounds that won't come off since the baby came. I think it's an overwhelming sense that "my body is never going to change" "I am never going to change" ...
So I'm sitting here, trying to think of how I got hope. What can I say to encourage you? Well, let's be clear about one thing first, hope is only found in Christ. If you are in Him you have an eternal hope of glory. Our bodies here on this earth will never work perfectly but thankfully when we pass into glory we will get a new body that will be perfect. No more of these earthly struggles. Let me just yell here: PRAISE THE LORD! I'm not gonna have to deal with this thing anymore.
Okay, after that I think what gave me a lot of hope was just pulling away from the world. I stopped watching TV, stopped reading "Fit" and "YM" and just started asking God, "What do You think of me?" The message of the world is that I will never be skinny enough, my hair will never be perfect enough, I will never be rich enough. It's not that I had to separate myself from people so much, I just had to really start to monitor what I looked at and listened to.
The more I asked the Lord what He thought, the more I asked Him what He gave me to eat... little by little, without even realizing it, I began to lose weight. The thing is, the Holy Spirit never told me to overeat. :) If anything, He gave me the self-control to pass up dessert if I didn't need it, the presence of mind not to overeat in the afternoon. I knew that God created fruits and vegetables for my benefit with all the vitamins and minerals in them. It was this new and crazy way of eating.
I know some of you may think I'm crazy with this, but I'm just being honest. This by no means has been a perfect process. I mess up often and stray from His leading often, but God has poured out mercy in my life in these times. He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness. He is slow to anger and abounding in love.
I feel like weight loss needs to be almost unnoticeable. What is the saying? A watched pot never boils? When I keep stepping on the scale every day and several times a day, when I keep going and looking in the mirror at my stomach and keep thinking about it I defeat myself. When I exercise too hard and starve myself I either collapse or I give up and eat everything in sight.
All my life whenever I would TRY to lose weight I would either maintain or gain. That sounds crazy right? I think it was because my trying was fueled by my own self-will. As soon as my self-will burnt out I would crash and binge. I am still amazed at how long I did this. I mean, it was years of dieting one week and crashing that weekend, crashing several times in a week even. Maybe keeping it up for a two or three weeks (I'm not sure how long sometimes it runs together in my mind) and then crashing. Maybe because the amount of weight felt insurmountable. I remember when I reached 50 pounds over what I needed to be... it felt like I would never go back. I remember being categorized on the doctor's charts as being "obese" ... I really remember that, that hopelessness.
Hopelessness is a dark place. I think many women feel this way about their weight. Maybe you have 100 pounds to lose, maybe it's just the last 20 pounds that won't come off since the baby came. I think it's an overwhelming sense that "my body is never going to change" "I am never going to change" ...
So I'm sitting here, trying to think of how I got hope. What can I say to encourage you? Well, let's be clear about one thing first, hope is only found in Christ. If you are in Him you have an eternal hope of glory. Our bodies here on this earth will never work perfectly but thankfully when we pass into glory we will get a new body that will be perfect. No more of these earthly struggles. Let me just yell here: PRAISE THE LORD! I'm not gonna have to deal with this thing anymore.
Okay, after that I think what gave me a lot of hope was just pulling away from the world. I stopped watching TV, stopped reading "Fit" and "YM" and just started asking God, "What do You think of me?" The message of the world is that I will never be skinny enough, my hair will never be perfect enough, I will never be rich enough. It's not that I had to separate myself from people so much, I just had to really start to monitor what I looked at and listened to.
The more I asked the Lord what He thought, the more I asked Him what He gave me to eat... little by little, without even realizing it, I began to lose weight. The thing is, the Holy Spirit never told me to overeat. :) If anything, He gave me the self-control to pass up dessert if I didn't need it, the presence of mind not to overeat in the afternoon. I knew that God created fruits and vegetables for my benefit with all the vitamins and minerals in them. It was this new and crazy way of eating.
I know some of you may think I'm crazy with this, but I'm just being honest. This by no means has been a perfect process. I mess up often and stray from His leading often, but God has poured out mercy in my life in these times. He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness. He is slow to anger and abounding in love.
Friday, February 11, 2011
The Redemption of My Physical Body: part four
I want you all to know that I am not writing this to be give a formula or anything. I think all my life I just wanted the Christian walk to be formulaic. If I do x and y then I will end up being z ... I didn't want to have to depend on and walk with God. So I don't want you to read this thing and think, oh, I just need to do what she did. No! You need to seek the Lord, walk with him, trust him with what you have and give up or lay down only what HE calls you to do.
I just wanted to say that.
Something the Lord has literally called me to lay down is the television.
We don't have a TV in our home, not because I don't like the TV, it's because I LOVE the TV. I could watch it all day, I have before. I've wasted weekends and evenings in front of the tube. Tube is a good name for it, because it sucks your time away. I am also blessed because Ben (my husband) is not interested in the TV. He would much rather play computer games or just DO something. Since meeting Ben I have lost over 40 pounds. I will say I think the weight loss was a combination of many many things, but I think that not having a TV to watch played a major role.
Some of you are really freaking out as you read this. Give up my TV? Not have it on while I clean the house? Not watch it after a tired day of work and kids? Not watch it during dinner? I'm going to be so bored, it will be too quiet.
Again, I am not wanting to be formulaic. This was an individual thing for me. But I will suggest one thing: if this caused a freak out moment for you, is it an idol? ... I'm just asking the question and asking you to pray about it. That's all. Nothing more, nothing less.
One thing I do to help me fill my day is listen to podcasts. I listen while I'm doing laundry and cleaning. They help me keep my mind busy and just keep working, but I never have to stop and see something (you know like you are tempted to do when you are watching a show?) These are just things that are true in my life, it may totally not apply to you!
Okay, one more thing.
This is what would discourage me the most about watching television. On the shows there were impossibly thin women. I could never be that skinny. They are attractive and amazing. They are strong and disrespectful of men. They also sleep around a lot. And they are attractive. And I want to be like them. Okay, maybe not if you asked me outright, but I think deep in my subconscious I totally wanted to be like any of the desperate housewives, Jordan on Crossing Jordan, the CSI women, the Gilmore Girls, and especially the Laguna Beach girls... Oh man, I've probably got a dozen more shows, but you get the point. So, I was watching them and then I would get some nice commercial breaks where they are flashing delicious pizza and burgers and all kinds of food in front of me. Thought process: "Oh man, I'm so hungry. Oh man, I'm so fat... I'll never be like one of those girls, I might as well enjoy life and get me a bag of chips..."
Does that make sense? I don't know, I think I realized this one day. It was like I was shooting my self esteem down and drooling over temptation all within a matter of 5 minutes.
This is why we will never have a television in our house.
I will get onto my story, I just had to take a break and write about this. I hope it was thought-provoking. If you have any arguments against me, feel free to leave a comment! I would love to hear your thoughts.
I just wanted to say that.
Something the Lord has literally called me to lay down is the television.
We don't have a TV in our home, not because I don't like the TV, it's because I LOVE the TV. I could watch it all day, I have before. I've wasted weekends and evenings in front of the tube. Tube is a good name for it, because it sucks your time away. I am also blessed because Ben (my husband) is not interested in the TV. He would much rather play computer games or just DO something. Since meeting Ben I have lost over 40 pounds. I will say I think the weight loss was a combination of many many things, but I think that not having a TV to watch played a major role.
Some of you are really freaking out as you read this. Give up my TV? Not have it on while I clean the house? Not watch it after a tired day of work and kids? Not watch it during dinner? I'm going to be so bored, it will be too quiet.
Again, I am not wanting to be formulaic. This was an individual thing for me. But I will suggest one thing: if this caused a freak out moment for you, is it an idol? ... I'm just asking the question and asking you to pray about it. That's all. Nothing more, nothing less.
One thing I do to help me fill my day is listen to podcasts. I listen while I'm doing laundry and cleaning. They help me keep my mind busy and just keep working, but I never have to stop and see something (you know like you are tempted to do when you are watching a show?) These are just things that are true in my life, it may totally not apply to you!
Okay, one more thing.
This is what would discourage me the most about watching television. On the shows there were impossibly thin women. I could never be that skinny. They are attractive and amazing. They are strong and disrespectful of men. They also sleep around a lot. And they are attractive. And I want to be like them. Okay, maybe not if you asked me outright, but I think deep in my subconscious I totally wanted to be like any of the desperate housewives, Jordan on Crossing Jordan, the CSI women, the Gilmore Girls, and especially the Laguna Beach girls... Oh man, I've probably got a dozen more shows, but you get the point. So, I was watching them and then I would get some nice commercial breaks where they are flashing delicious pizza and burgers and all kinds of food in front of me. Thought process: "Oh man, I'm so hungry. Oh man, I'm so fat... I'll never be like one of those girls, I might as well enjoy life and get me a bag of chips..."
Does that make sense? I don't know, I think I realized this one day. It was like I was shooting my self esteem down and drooling over temptation all within a matter of 5 minutes.
This is why we will never have a television in our house.
I will get onto my story, I just had to take a break and write about this. I hope it was thought-provoking. If you have any arguments against me, feel free to leave a comment! I would love to hear your thoughts.
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