Of course I don't feel like blogging. I just can't help it.
I have to admit, the past two days haven't been that bad. I've had moments of smelling something or feeling exhausted or hungry and nauseated at the same time (this is always a weird phenomenon because you don't want to eat and you want to eat at the same time). In general, it's been better than Monday.
I was thinking this morning about how thankful I am that I don't have to get up and go to work every day. Granted, what I do is hard work at home, but at least I don't have to worry about being late or have to worry about looking good and being dressed nicely. :) Haha! I worked part time when I was pregnant with Levi. I remember trying to find ways to work as little as possible. All I wanted to do was lay in bed. I was also very fortunate then because we were living with Ben's parents and his amazing mom fixed all of our dinners. I didn't have to cook at all. I think I tried to load the dishwasher when I could. But really, I was totally a pampered. Now I've got my own household and my own little person to take care of. I remember asking my sister in law how she took care of her two kids during her first trimester and feeling terrible. She said, "You just do what is necessary and what you can't do, don't worry about." I'm realizing that with each kid my standards of "clean" are probably going to go down a bit. Thankfully I have a husband who doesn't mind vacuuming and helping clean up the kitchen, but I'm realizing that my house doesn't have to be spotless during this time and my meals don't have to be incredible. Really, it probably just needs to be decently healthy food. We're having frozen pizza, broccoli and ranch tonight. :)
One weird thing is that it's almost as though Levi knows I'm pregnant. Maybe it's because I've been acting strange lately, maybe it's because I have been home more these past few weeks, but he has become extremely clingy. Not that I mind it, it makes me feel needed and wanted. I know that he values me, but sometimes it is a little bit annoying. He definitely likes to get up on the couch with me and cuddle and get as close as he can, loves to be held and especially wants to be held while I'm making dinner. This can be difficult when you are already tired. I love him so much. Disciplining him is becoming more challenging with me being tired and him getting older and craftier. Help me Lord. I need You.
If you all would pray for me. I'm hoping for a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) for this little one. I'm excited to have a very pro VBAC Dr and a good support system around me. I feel like the medical community has a difficult time with this one because in some cases birth can be a medical emergency and in other cases it's a natural part of life. I'm praying that I will have the right perspective, the right heart. I want what is best for my baby and I believe that is a VBAC. I would covet your prayers for me in this area.